As we step into 2025, it’s the right time to replicate on what’s holding us again and make area for progress. Every Enneagram kind has its personal distinctive tendencies—strengths that may additionally grow to be limitations if left unchecked. In my years as an Enneagram coach, I’ve seen how a single mindset shift can unlock highly effective transformations. Let’s dive into what your kind may have to launch this 12 months to really really feel empowered and thrive.
Sort 1: The Perfectionist
What to Let Go of: The necessity to all the time “get it proper.”
You carry a lot in your shoulders, feeling like all the things is dependent upon you—as if the world may crumble if you happen to don’t maintain it collectively. This 12 months, it’s time to problem that perception. I labored with a Sort 1 who resented her household for all of the obligations she took on. However she by no means requested for assist! She wished them to “mind-read,” which solely deepened her frustration. On prime of that, she held herself to unattainable requirements, making rest or self-care really feel out of attain as a result of there was all the time extra to do. The second she sat down she was flooded with issues she felt she wanted to “repair.”
Her breakthrough got here when she started seeing “accepting the mess” as a manner of leveling up slightly than leveling down. She began praising herself for permitting small imperfections in pursuit of upper objectives—like being sincere about needing assist slightly than silently resenting others and doing all of it herself. Serenity doesn’t come from all the things being good; it comes from realizing you don’t must do it on their lonesome. Think about what might shift if you happen to gave your self permission to ask for assist and let others see your humanity.
“Perfection will not be attainable, but when we chase perfection, we will catch excellence.” – Vince Lombardi
You may also get pleasure from: Escaping the Entice of Resentment for Enneagram Ones
Sort 2: The Helper
What to Let Go of: The concern of being unloved if you happen to set boundaries.
You’ve spent a lot power giving to others, typically on the expense of your individual well-being. I labored with a Sort 2 who couldn’t say no when individuals requested for assist. She’d tackle everybody’s emotional burdens, spreading herself so skinny that she was too drained to help the individuals she beloved most. She wished to be all the things for everybody, however it left her indignant, drained, and deeply sad as a result of her personal wants have been all the time final on the checklist.
Her progress began when she realized that saying no wasn’t egocentric—it was loving. By setting boundaries, she might deal with the relationships that actually mattered and present up extra totally for the individuals she cared about most. This 12 months, strive asking your self: “Is that this really mine to hold?” Defending your power doesn’t make you much less type or loving; it permits you to give from a spot of abundance.
“You may’t pour from an empty cup. Handle your self first.” – Unknown
Discover out extra about Twos: The Enneagram 2 and Stress
Sort 3: The Achiever
What to Let Go of: The fixed have to show your worth.
You’re unimaginable at attaining, however does it ever really feel like your accomplishments outline you? A good friend of mine was as soon as a workaholic who fixated on how different individuals interpreted her or how “profitable” she was. Her days have been filled with work and to-do lists, and there was all the time a better rung on the ladder to succeed in for. All this work acquired her an incredible profession {and professional} accolades, however she typically felt that there was a meaningless to all of it. Beneath her success, she felt lonely and unloved.
Her turning level got here when she began embracing vulnerability. I do know it sounds scary and actually cringey. Once I share my vulnerabilities I are inclined to really feel like I’m getting undressed in entrance of somebody, solely emotionally. For my good friend it felt unusual at first to share her struggles with others, however it opened the door to deeper, extra significant connections. As a substitute of feeling like all her relationships have been shallow, all the things began to really feel extra significant. She felt much less alone and extra genuine. She realized to decide on individuals who worth realness—those that had already proven they may share their very own vulnerabilities. This 12 months, keep in mind: your value doesn’t come out of your trophies or titles. It’s okay to decelerate and let individuals see the true you. You’re already sufficient.
“We regularly block our personal blessings as a result of we don’t really feel inherently ok or sensible sufficient or fairly sufficient or worthy sufficient… You’re worthy since you are born and since you are right here. Your being right here, your being alive makes worthiness your birthright. You alone are sufficient.” — Oprah Winfrey
Sort 4: The Individualist
What to Let Go of: The idea that you just’re basically flawed.
You typically really feel like nobody actually will get you—such as you’re too totally different, too difficult, or simply an excessive amount of. That feeling will be isolating, however it doesn’t imply you’re flawed. A Sort 4 I labored with used to say, “I don’t assume I’ll ever belong anyplace.” However the extra they leaned into their uniqueness, the extra they found how helpful it was.
This 12 months, problem your self to cease specializing in what’s lacking and begin celebrating what’s already right here. It’s not about becoming in; it’s about exhibiting up as your self and trusting that the suitable individuals will join with you. Let your self be seen, even when it feels uncomfortable. You don’t have to have all of the solutions or repair each perceived imperfection to be worthy of affection and belonging. You already are.
“You’re imperfect, you’re wired for battle, however you’re worthy of affection and belonging.” – Brené Brown
You may additionally get pleasure from: The Management Kinds of Each Enneagram Sort
Sort 5: The Investigator
What to Let Go of: The concern that you just’ll by no means have sufficient information or assets.
You like to study. There’s nothing incorrect with that—it’s your superpower. However typically, that thirst for info turns into a security internet, conserving you from taking motion. I had a Sort 5 shopper who was endlessly getting ready for the “proper second” to begin their ardour undertaking. They researched all the things, each angle, and each doable consequence. However you realize what? The “good second” by no means got here.
This 12 months, let’s change that. Belief what you already know and take the subsequent step. It’d really feel uncomfortable, even dangerous, however progress doesn’t occur in your consolation zone. You’re succesful. You are ready. Now it’s time to behave.
“The one technique to do nice work is to cease considering and begin doing.” – Unknown
You may additionally get pleasure from: The Enneagram 5 Youngster
Sort 6: The Loyalist
What to Let Go of: The necessity to put together for each doable catastrophe.
You’ve got a present for recognizing potential issues. It’s what makes you dependable and reliable. However typically, that power turns into overthinking, leaving you caught in “what if” mode. I’ve a Sort 6 good friend who couldn’t loosen up on a household journey as a result of they have been nervous about all the things that would go incorrect—the climate, the automotive, the reservations. They spent extra time planning for disasters than having fun with the moments proper in entrance of them.
This 12 months, lean into belief. Belief that you just’ve executed sufficient to arrange, that you just’re resilient sufficient to deal with no matter comes, and that not each situation wants a backup plan. Life is unpredictable, sure, however it’s additionally filled with magnificence whenever you let go of the necessity to management each element.
“Fear doesn’t empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties right now of its power.” – Corrie Ten Growth
You may additionally like: The Emotions You Run Away From, Based mostly On Your Enneagram Sort
Sort 7: The Fanatic
What to Let Go of: The concern of lacking out.
You’re all the time on the transfer, chasing the subsequent huge factor. Your power is contagious, and it lights up everybody round you. However typically, that have to maintain shifting retains you from appreciating what’s proper in entrance of you. Search for the little miracles; the scent of the earth after the rain, the wealthy heat of a sip of espresso, the glimmer of the celebrities on a cool winter evening. As a result of right here’s the factor: One of the best moments in life aren’t all the time those you chase—they’re those you pause lengthy sufficient to note.
This 12 months, attempt to decelerate. Keep current. As a substitute of eager about what’s subsequent, savor what’s now. You may be stunned at how a lot pleasure you discover whenever you give your self permission to be nonetheless.
“Be glad for this second. This second is your life.” – Omar Khayyam
Uncover extra: The Emotional Patterns of Every Enneagram Sort
Sort 8: The Challenger
What to Let Go of: The idea that vulnerability is weak point.
You’re a powerhouse. Folks know they will rely on you to be robust, to take cost, to guard. However typically, that power turns into a protect, conserving others at a distance (or intimidating them). I labored with a Sort 8 who stated, “I don’t let individuals see my weak aspect—it’s too harmful.” However over time, they realized that vulnerability isn’t weak point; it’s braveness.
This 12 months, let your self be seen. Speak in confidence to the individuals you belief. Share slightly of your softer aspect, even when it feels uncomfortable. Ask forgiveness for instances your mood has flared up. It’d really feel gross at first, however energy by way of as a result of you realize you’re robust sufficient for this. Vulnerability creates connection, and connection is what makes us human. You don’t must do all the things alone.
“Vulnerability will not be successful or shedding; it’s having the braveness to point out up and be seen when we have now no management over the result.” – Brené Brown
Sort 9: The Peacemaker
What to Let Go of: The tendency to keep away from battle in any respect prices.
You’ve got a present for conserving the peace, for making individuals really feel comfy. However typically, avoiding battle means silencing your self. I personally have an Enneagram 9 member of the family who places up with a lot discomfort and emotional ache as a result of she doesn’t need to “rock the boat.” However right here’s the reality: Your voice issues. Your concepts matter. You matter. Would you prefer it if somebody you deeply beloved handled themselves the way in which you deal with your self?
Give it some thought.
This 12 months, apply talking up. Begin small—share your opinion, even when it’s totally different from others’. Advocate to your wants, even when it feels uncomfortable. Battle doesn’t must be scary; it may be the doorway to understanding and progress. You’re value being heard.
“Peace will not be the absence of battle, however the means to deal with it.” – Dorothy Thomas
You may additionally get pleasure from: The Egocentric Variations of Every Enneagram Sort
What Do You Suppose?
As you think about these reflections, keep in mind that progress doesn’t occur in a single day. It’s a means of small, constant steps. Letting go is sort of by no means straightforward, however it’s all the time value it. In the event you’re able to take step one, think about journaling about what feels impactful to you and what modifications you’d prefer to see by the tip of the 12 months.
Retry later
